Tell Me Something Good!: I Might Be Driving Myself Crazy . . .

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

I Might Be Driving Myself Crazy . . .

Surprise!! I know, who would think that Ms. Understood, non-mommy of the duo, would have the first mommy spotlight. Well, that is because I have a question for all you moms out there. How did you prepare?

My husband and I look at the cost of day care and get scared. From the date you got that positive test result to the day you took your little one home, how did you get ready ??

(physically, financially, etc)

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Danielle · 767 weeks ago

You can't prepare. Even though we decided to have babies and then had them, we prepared for that much, I decided to stay home, we researched doctors and you can do the same thing with day cares and products you may buy and need. But as far as having a baby and dealing with the baby in your life, there is no proeparation that could really prepare you. You kind of have to prepare to be unprepared, to be challenged and for things to get chaotic but for the love and laughter to double. And for life meaningful,more exciting and for this child to mean more to you then you could ever imagine.

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@KisseGirl · 767 weeks ago

Part 1

Well let me tell you! My oldest biological child is 16. I'm 36 which means I was 19 when I got pregnant with him and 20 when he was born. Needless to say, I didn't prepare for anything. My husband (who was my boyfriend at the time) and I just did what we had to do. He already had a 2 year old and was 22 at the time. I've been blessed to have a very supportive family to help us through it all!! I was able to finish college because of them!! When I look back, I'm so glad I had my children at an early age (although I do NOT recommend this to any 19 yr old) but because I had them so early, I didn't go into it with all of the worries and concerns that I would have had I been much older! Con't
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@KisseGirl · 767 weeks ago

Part 2

When you are older, you view things on a whole nother level and sometimes too much thought about all of the good and bad that can happen, would cause you to talk yourself out of great experiences. I know I'm going on and on but It's so much to be said about this. The bottom line is you will NEVER be totally ready for a child. You just have to trust and know that everything that you need the Lord will provide it! Trust me, I know. When the time comes for you to buy milk and diapers and daycare etc. you will be amazed at the things you can juggle around to get it done! Once the baby is here and you look that precious one in the eyes, the love that you have for it will be enough to make whatever that baby may need possible!!
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Mrs. R · 767 weeks ago

Well I think I am a little different. I am a pure type A personality, so I did major research before we decided to try for a baby. We knew we wanted to have kids soon after marriage, so we started with our financial plan. We paid off the majority of our debts (excluding the home) and built up our savings because I want to stay home full time with the baby. I didn't take sick or annual leave at work that much, so now I will have 3 months of paid maternity leave thanks to all the hours I built up. I didn't have regular periods before, so I started TTC a year before (while engaged) to figure out my cycle. I got my body ready by doing tons of internet research and started taking prenatal pills and changed my diet ahead of time. As you can see, a baby has always been on our minds. LOL!! My husband said I am the queen of research and I am!!

Right now my husband and I are buying most of the things we need, anything we get as a gift will be icing on the cake! Both of my parents are retired, so is his mom, so we have already talked about a schedule with them to help us out when the baby comes. We researched hospitals for delivery, specific doctors to make sure their beliefs were in line with ours for a natural birth, and now we are starting on pediatricians. Of course I know that once the baby arrives, I will be thrown curve balls left and right. However, I feel more at ease knowing that we put in the hard work ahead of time. I am also lucky enough to have such a strong support system, if we are lacking in anything, they will step in. It takes a village to raise a child!!
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1 reply · active 766 weeks ago

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motdubonjour 2p · 766 weeks ago

Thank you Mrs. R! DH and I are planning to start a family soon and sometimes I feel like we must both be type A's and maybe over-doing preparing.... But we are not! We can't afford childcare with debt, we need an emergency fund (i.e. savings) for additional hospital cost and to cover lost income during the maternity leave. Plus all the purchases that comes with preparing for a baby. I want to be ready... and then enjoy every single minute! :)
We listen to Dave Ramsey, and 2011 is it (the year I am turning 30, aaah!)! I will be at least pregnant but definitely having a baby!
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preshusmedotcom 29p · 767 weeks ago

I wish I could have saved money to prepare for having kids, but losing my job when I did derailed all of my careful financial planning and I'm still recovering from all of that. Mentally, I've always been prepared for having kids. I've always known that I wanted them, it was just a matter of hubby being ready too. I don't think it could have been possible to be prepared for the constant "alertness" that comes with being a mom. I'm always on, never have a day off. It's hard to get used to, but you do. Physically I was very prepared, but I attribute that to the fact that I dealt with infertility for a long time so in that way I was forced into preparation. At the end of the day was I prepared? Sure, as much as anyone can be. My goal was to have children regardless of whether or not my finances or personal situation was prepared for it. Luckily we have free babysitting in the form of my retired mother, but even without her we would have made it work somehow.

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Ms. Understood · 767 weeks ago

Thanks so much for weighing in. It has really helped me to works some things out in my head. I'm like Mrs. R. If I can't plan, I will feel hopeless and useless. I know that when it comes to babies, you can't plan it to a T, but being prepared is major for me. Sounds like a lot of you are blessed to have family who can assist with child care or you can stay home yourself so you don't have to worry about who is "raising" your child whlie you are at work. That's a big issue for us. I hate that I have to return, not because I don't want to, but because I feel that I will miss beautiful moments with our baby that a "stranger" gets to enjoy. If it was family, it would probably be a easier pill to swallow. We're pretty much here in this area by ourselves. No family that isn't working who can provide child care. His family is down south and mine is in the Caribbean.
My recent post I feel something in there

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-CK · 767 weeks ago

Hmmm well I'm an avid book reader so I gorged on pregnancy books and midwifery books during pregnancy. I took a hypnobirthing class with my husband that I enjoyed. Around 6-7 months pregnancy (this happened with all three pregnancies) I got some natural urge to clean out the closet, put diapers in a nice neat pile and hang ribbon around the kids' room... Every mom "nests" in her own way but I just found it thrilling to have the room/bed ready.
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Christina 47p · 767 weeks ago

I did an INSANE amount of reading. I devoured every piece of information I could find! I researched every single baby item we needed, read hundreds of reviews, shopped around for best price, made what I couldnt find. I cleaned like a mad woman, and tried to get my husband to do the same, lol. I felt confident about how to care for Izzy, and I really think that's the most you can do! There's no way to prepare for the mental, physical, and emotional drain, but you can arm yourself with as much knowledge as you can carry!

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Ms. Understood · 767 weeks ago

Are there any readers that had to use a non-familial child care when their child was infant/toddler?? How did you adjust to that?

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chriswife 58p · 767 weeks ago

I researched, I read all the books, i read all the blogs, I read of the message boards. I was PREPARED! And then it all went out the window, and I just had to do.
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Sharina Johnson · 767 weeks ago

I did a lot of research, read all of the baby books, and got advice from as many other moms as I could. The thing is to be honest, for me at least, nothing could have prepared me, lol. It really is "on the job training" and I find that I have as many questions about raising kids as I did before I had them. Knowledge is power though, and I would advise people to read as much as they can as Christina had mentioned. It helps, but you don't really realize the depth of it until you are actually in it!

New follower from MBC, I love the concept of this blog and look forward to stopping by here often :)
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1 reply · active 767 weeks ago

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Ms. Understood · 767 weeks ago

I love the title of your more recent post. I guess that's really how you have to look at it when you get into the situation. I definitely will ask the moms in my life how to go about it. None of my friends have kids so folks will have be reach back into their memory banks when I ask, LOL. I'll try to keep that in mind, it really is, on the job training.
My recent post I feel something in there

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Teresha · 767 weeks ago

Like Danielle said you can prepare for some things like getting your body ready for the rigors of pregnancy and birth, getting your finances in order, getting your home ready. But there really is no way to prepare for the emotional impact of becoming a parent. It just sort of hits you like a tons of brick and then you find your footing and you gain your balance and voila you're a mommy or daddy. There is such a thing as over-preparing. I read way too much stuff and suffered from information overload. After a while I let my maternal instincts take over.

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Sassy Gigi · 767 weeks ago

So, I just found you on MBC and wanted to stop by and follow you.

Would love if you returned the favor. Your site is cute!
http://couponclippintexan.com/

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